50

Well the day has finally arrived. I have said goodbye to many decades of my life but this one is different. I have lived half a century on this earth. I have seen good and bad. I have seen some of the greatest life changing inventions ever created. I have seen history made. Some were great moments in history and some have rocked our country to its very core.
    Now is the time in life where you reflect back on your life. Some moments of my life bring a smile to my face while others make me sad. Choices that I made some good some not so great also come to mind. How could my life turned out differently with a few different choices. A little more thought could have saved me some heartache along the way. Patience is what I lack and looking back, with a little patience my choices might have been different. My life looking back is a winding road that led me to where I am today. The good choices made far outweigh the bad I will say.
    Then I look back at all of the people who have had an impact on my life. The influences that have stayed with me all my life. First and foremost God and my Lord Jesus Christ. There is always that small little voice inside me to tell me what I should do in life if I choose to listen. There is my mom whose voice I can still hear every day and I try to live a life that will not disrespect her memory.  My grandparents, though I only had them for a short time in my life left a tremendous impact. My older brother who showed me what a great man looks like and gave me a measuring stick. There were pastors to lean on along the way who always had an open ear and heart. They did not judge but offered Godly council. There was my best friend Gary Flood who showed me time and again what a real friend is. There is my dad who by all accounts is the first super hero I ever knew. He was tough as nails but knew how to be a father. He taught me about real love and how to give. There were cousins whom I shared my childhood with and now we share our adulthood good and bad. There were aunts and uncles who taught me life lessons and what it meant to work. Billy Burks I thank you for teaching me about hard work. That has stayed with me my whole life and I love you for it.
   I have faced loss and came out on the other side. I have learned how to move on and learn a new normal without those loved ones. I have seen one marriage dissolve into misery and learn to start over with my best friend. 
   In my short 50 years I have seen a lot and good Lord willing I will get to see more. I know that life is a continuous battle and all the lessons learned will be used to face future challenges. I also know the next 50 will pose different challenges. God Bless
Kenney Big Skinny Pope

One Week

Like a child waiting on Christmas here I am waiting. I'm waiting on the best present I could have asked for and its all wrapped up in you. Its just a mere week and its been 4 years in the making, my forever. So glad I found you and I can't tell you enough.
   As we sit in silence watching the Sunrise together just enjoying each other. I realize with every love song playing that these songs were wrote about us. Its a gift when you can take something broke and piece it back together. That's what you have done with my heart. I had all but given up on love but you showed me it would be better than just ok to try again.
In just a mere week a new chapter will begin for us as you will take my last name.  So many things were missing my first go round into marriage from the start.  I never had someone that wanted to be a part of everything in my life. I never had someone encourage me to follow my dreams. I never had someone completely believe in me.  You give me wings to fly.  You still believe in me when I come crashing to the ground.  Our relationship is built on mutual respect. Even though you will never be the one to put all of your thoughts into words I will never doubt how you feel. You show me many times daily your devotion and care.
  In a mere week we will see the sunsets differently, as one.  We will build our life together. We will experience tears of joy and laughter. We will be there for each other when times aren't so good. We will always have the other's back.  You are a force to be reckoned with If someone hurts a loved one. 
   What I am saying is in just a week I will be proud to be your man, protector and provider. You will always be loved. Thank you for taking a chance on me.
One week and I can't wait. 

Perfect World

While enjoying the weather last night, I told Cynthia it was perfect. I then asked her I wonder how many perfect weather days we have a year? Then I answered my own question. Its really a hard question to answer. Its subjective to what one considers perfect. What's perfect to me might not be to you. For example a 55 degree day with a light northwest breeze is my perfect day. One of those sweatshirt and jeans kind of day is my favorite kind of days. Maybe your perfect weather day is sunny and 85.
   The word perfect could literally have millions of meanings. That is where we are as a nation. Everyone has their own idea of what a perfect world would be. I believe that's why we are taught to share as a child. We are taught to compromise. We can't be selfish and think that it is only going to be perfect for us all the time. Now when I say compromise I'm not talking about your core beliefs. That includes morals and the things you were taught that make you a better person. What I'm talking about is meeting someone half way. Like maybe a sunny 70 degree day instead of 55. See we met in the middle somewhere and although it's not perfect to either one of us its a compromise we can both live with.
   Its not a perfect world we live in and its not ever going to be but some are so stuck seeing only their perfect way that they miss out on a lot of life. We sometimes need to think less of ourselves and think about what we can do to make it a more perfect world for others.  Sometimes we need to see things the way others do to understand where they are coming from. There are a long line of people in this world that were mistreated and have taught hate for generations because of injustices done against them. We can speak hate back at them but honestly if we just took a second and looked at the world through their eyes what would we see?  Are we doing all we can to make it a more perfect world for all or just ourselves. Truth is there is not one who couldn't do more. The world we are leaving for future generations is a scary thought.  Things going on I never thought I would see in my lifetime. Nearing 50 years of age I realize what I thought was a perfect world is not and never was. I was just seeing things through my eyes. 
    Look if it was all about me God would just make it 55 degrees every day but as you have noticed we have an abundance of someone's idea of a perfect day every day. Lets look beyond ourselves and make this a more perfect world.

Kenney Big Skinny Pope

Goodbye

It was a tough week for me as I had to say goodbye to a companion and friend. She was a bit temperamental and possessive but hey we all have our faults. She was full of love and in return she showed love until the end. Even though she was frail and was fighting to take a breath, the minute I walked into the door from work her ears perked as she tried to stand. I reached down and helped her to her feet and she stood as best she could. She was letting me know that she knew I was there. I knew she was in bad shape but did not know she would be gone in a few hours. My world revolved around that little furbaby. After my divorce she was all I had to remind me of my former life. 
    When I left for work while living with dad for a short while after my separation and divorce; she would howl because she did not like it when I left her alone. She had some form of separation anxiety I am guessing. I will say that it made her so happy to see me when I came home. In the last four years since me and Cynthia have been together, whenever we came home from being out it was always me she ran to. Her and Cynthia formed a bond even though they fought over space in the bed. Sugar always wanted to be next to me. She would work her way between me and Cee no matter where I sat her before I drifted off to sleep. I would wake in the morning and most morning she would be perched on Cynthia's pillow between us. I will not lie it was a point of contention between the two. I remember the conversations between the two still. He is my man Cee would say, of course it was one sided Sugar never said a word as Cee was speaking to her but I know she was thinking that I was her's first. She wasn't about to give me up.
   Sugar was my protector at a whopping 5 lbs. If she was sitting on my lap you didn't mess with me because she would attack. She was always on my lap. 
    I did my best to care for her in her latter years. Her sight was gone and she went deaf and she struggled to walk but she made her way around. I will admit I probably should have put her down a while back but I was selfish. I didn't want see her suffer and as best as I could tell she was still getting around okay until about a week ago. At 18 years of age she had a good long life. 
    RIp Sugar you were loved and you will be missed. My lap will be colder and I miss those playful conversations between you and Cee in the mornings. I especially miss the way you would totally ignore her as you had your little doggie butt on her head on her pillow as you snuggled up close to me every night. I will miss those morning doggie breath kisses as I picked you up off the bed so you could do your business. You were a little shivering ball of fur on winter mornings and got it done quickly.
    Love you little buddy